A true story.
With my hair wet and combed back like a little boy I found myself standing
in a watercolor meadow. Soft white clouds in a pure blue sky. Green grass on
rolling hills. It felt and looked like the most beautiful place in the world. In
my dream I switched from looking through my eyes to looking at myself as
another person. I was in my pajamas, fresh from a bath. My red hair was redder
than ever because it was wet. Fat cheeks splattered with freckles and
blue eyes, bright with delight. I was holding my favorite teddy bear and we were
about to take a ride. As in the way of dreams, things can suddenly appear, and I
was now standing at the bottom of a stair case. A moving stair case,
much like the fancy stairs they have in the malls called escalators. These stairs
were wood and although at four I wouldn’t have known they were oak, as a
grown up I am able to describe them as such.
I could not see the top of the stairs as they ascended up into the heavens. I
was not scared, and neither was teddy. With my right arm gripping the fuzzy
bear, I stepped onto the first step and took hold of the rail with my left hand.
We started going up slow and steady. I looked around at the wonder of it all. It
felt wonderful, it felt right and I was completely happy. I took in all the beauty
around and (now) below me and thought the colors must be straight out of
my favorite crayon box.
Me and teddy, we were getting pretty high and heading for the sky. I lifted
my face to look up in the direction we were heading and there was still a long
way to go. I didn’t feel fear as I looked up, I never even wondered where I
was going, I was just going.
And again, as in the way of dreams, I switched from watching myself
outside of myself, to looking through my own eyes again. I turned my head and
looked down. What I saw shattered my dream, shattered all my good feelings
about where I was and where I was going. At the bottom of those stairs a tree
had appeared. Not a green leafy friendly tree, but a big black gnarly dead tree
that seemed to be sending it’s vicious branches up to get me. Long
knotty limbs were moving towards me, reaching for me, and grabbing at me. In
that one horrifying moment I felt the worst fear I would ever feel in the
subconscious or conscious world.
I screamed, I screamed myself into waking up. Sobbing, sweating and
alone. Thirty years after, I finally shared that dream with my best friend, and
now I have shared it with you.